Down in the dumps

So I'm so down today. I don't know why.. no idea. I just feel like I need to go blow off some serious steam. The kind that when you are so cooped up you have sex with your husband just so that it will fell better... not necessarily because you want to have sex with him.. just because you need the outlet. Problem is.. news flash.. I have no husband, in fact I have no boyfriend! And since were in the TMI department.. its been a VERY long time since I DID go wahoo!!

Guh... It must just be everything.. I work, I come home, I take care of kids, I clean my house, I clean my work, I go grocery shopping, bring kids to school, doctor, I have no outlet, no release.. just stress, stress, stress, Stress, STress, STRess, STREss, STRESs, STRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSs!!ds

My great bling weekend

So I had SUCH a full weekend. usually seems like my kidless weekend is short and that i don't do much. BUT.. oh this was so different... in a good way!! Friday my mama ad I went to see "27 dresses" ad it was cute..kinda predictable, and I only cried 3 times so that was good i figure. Sat I went to Orland with my mom and my sis met us there. We shopped ad had dinner.. it was so fun being with them.. it doesn't happen enough. While there I used my "me" money from my taxes to buy a diamond ring. It is sooo beautiful!! And come on.. who needs a man to buy you bling?? NOT ME BABY!!! I'm a woman.. HEAR ME BLING!! oops i mean roar! lol...



So then Sat night I went to have one drink with my friend and then came home depressed that i had no one to dance with, be all over, and kiss on. Couldn't sleep so I got online and was looking at things. Ended up responding to this personal add on a site and got emailed right back by the guy... ended up till almost 2 am talking with him online.

Sunday I went to a different mall and got myself a cell phone. I had been using one on my dads account since my separation and was time to stand on my own two feet. Plus I got my tax return and could afford to get one!! lol... Then i went home and cleaned all day. All the while testing Mr. Man. HAHAH.. i just came up for a name for him!! He is working at a restaurant right now because it makes good money and the shifts are flexible since he is... are you ready for this... going to grad school and then to law school...

However.... He goes by a different version of it... but he has the same first name as dick.. oye.. that came to me when i was in the shower yesterday.. of all the flippin names... but at least he doesn't go by the same derivative of it i guess!

The big discovery

So no.. my kids real names are NOT fred and freida. HOWEVER.. I do very often call them that. i have no idea why just one of those nicknames that have always been there. Their real names are Kole and Kassie. Since i said one yesterday figured i might as well make it wide known.

So this past weekend the kids were home with me. I really love having my weekends off with them. I feel like i dont see them enough, and its nice to have two full days with them. However.. then there are days. You all know them.. you all have them with your kids too. Well this past sunday the kids got into a basket of videos and brought one out that they wanted to watch. Kole kept saying I want to watch my movie!! He knew that it was his name written on it. It was the video of his 1st birthday party. How was I supposed to tel him no. "NO .. I got it recorded so that you would never see it!!" or "It's not yours!!" Um.. right.. yea neither of those would work. So I put it in and let them watch it. I tried to sit and read in the other room but after thousands of excited trips to tell me what was going on at the party... I finally just did what they asked and went in and sat with them. Talk about hard. Me pregnant with kassie with baby kole opening his presents. Me laughing, talking, hugging dick. Oye. You know all the memories aren't bad but those ones seem to hurt more than the really bad ones. And now we are on day three of crazy huge amounts of me being lonely again. I miss being held and wanted I miss having someone to talk to, someone to be with. Someone who will understand when i just need to lay my head on your lap or shoulder. some day. Some day the one who was meant to be will be here. i just have to get to the some day.

The Cutest words

So I just love the things my kids say. Freida says today on the way on home... Mommy why is it so so froggy outside? I said.. Did you say froggy? and she says back.. Yes its so very froggy out all days today!... what she meant was that it was Foggy out... lol

Freidas favorite vegetables are hands down is Recipes. She also knows that if you find a recipe under your seat cushion that means you are a princess. She likes cooked recipe's she likes raw recipe's. In other words... Peas.

And then there is my fred. this one can not be said so well without revealing his real name. It is Kole. So he comes home on Christmas eve and I'm putting them to bed. I am all excited to do the Christmas eve hype with him and I say so why do we have to go to bed good tonight? and he says very proudly "Because otherwise we will get a big rock named ME!! aka.. he would get a lump of coal!

Oh out of the mouths of babes.. What is the cute things your kidos have said?

Oh my.. it happned again!

How on earth did this many days go between my last post! ugh. Well I weighed myself today.. yes I know it hasnt been a week but hey... i couldnt wait. I started on Tuesday. I have lost 4 lbs! I'm exstatic. And I've finall gotten over the hump of the "chew on the chairs" feeling. I actually looked forward to my salad yesterday!! My kids have been such hams today.. we were just laying in my bed and they were taking turns playing hide and go seek. Of course.. that is if you can call it that since they were laying next to me with the blankets over their head! So I said.. I know, I know... Come here!! and they got on either side of me and I pulled the blanket over all our heads. Freida says... What are we doing? I replied... shhhh they will find us if you arent quite. So about a minute later my son goes.. "Momma.. who is gonna find us though? It's just us here" Oye when did he get so smart!!