Tuesday, March 18, 2008

hello guys

So i'm sorry its been so long... this past while has just really sucked.. I've been training the new girl, re-writing the OSHA standards for our whole office, and studying for a giant certification course that is costing my employer hundreds of dollars.. no pressure right!! So the OSHA class was today, i'm down to two weeks left of training her and my test is next Friday. And... I want to explode!!

Add all that to the worst month of Endometriosis I've had in a LONG time, No one that will take my state aid insurance card to give me an injection in my back.. so I'm in allot of physical pain. NOW.. add that to that and THEN add... that March 10th would have been my 7 year wedding anniversary... and that last St. Patrick's day was the very beginning of the very end. That was the night that all the sudden everyone around us realized there was a serious problem.

So its been really rough. Worst part is that i don't WANT to be married to him.. at all.. but my mom hit it on the head that its more a sadness about lost dreams then the guy.

Last night while putting my contacts (which i just got again after a year of glasses) away i ran out of solution grabbed the next bottle that was the WRONG solution (it has to be in a special case) and put it in the rest of the way to fill it up.... well ends up it has to be in the special case for a reason cause i burned (literally) the crap out of my eye.. fells quite swollen right now! and is bright red.

On a good note... and yes i'm going to try to end this on a good note.. I'm finally starting to feel comfortable in my life.. like the glove is starting to fit. Before I felt like I was wearing a glove that NEVER could have been mine and wasn't supposed to be. I brought the kids to the zoo tomorrow and that was so amazing.. i will FOREVER go to the zoo when it is cold/cool outside. there were so few people there that the kids got to get soooo close to so many of the animals!

2 comments:

Tracy said...

Wow, that was quite an unloading session!
1. I know you'll do great on your test!
2. I hope hope hope that you're feeling better soon and that you find someone who will shoot you up!
3. You'll get through this rough month. You've already proven that you're a strong person.
4. I am soooo glad you're back!

Lainey-Paney said...

hang in there....
sorry about the endo....
i'm glad you are back....
good luck on your test...
i know that here in texas, there are very*very*very few m'caid pain management specialists...