Sunday, January 20, 2008

The Moment

So I made dinner again from my Kraft magazine that comes in the mail. It was amazing as were the last three things that I made from it. I usually either turn on GAC on the TV or turn music on my computer with dinner. The kids like the music and it hides eating noises.. lol.. yes eating noises are my biggest pet peeve. Anyway I'm listening to Billy Ray Cyrus' song "Ready, Set, Don't Go" Its amazing and if you like him or not doesn't matter. If you are a parent you should listen to it. I like the version with just him better than the one with him and his daughter Millie.. aka Hanna Montana. I first heard this song when it was on a music video. I had missed it before and it made me cry. He wrote it about his daughter. About how they will leave and follow their dreams and even though you don't want to you support them. It was just on while we were eating and I found myself stopping eating to look at my babies. They are so not babies anymore. Fred is 4 1/2 and Freida is 3. So grown up. Fred will be in Kindergarten in the "big school" next year and Freida will be in Preschool. I'm having a hard time with the transition of not having babies. So anyway... I was looking at them remembering. When they were born was the two most amazing days of my life bar none. Their first words, first steps, first true Love you mama. That one where you see it in their eyes and its not just a reaction to something they are supposed to say. It all just flew through my head like a movie. I looked at Freida again and she glanced up at me. All disheveled from play today, hair in her face from bending over to eat. A smear of Sun Dried Tomato dressing on her cheek. She gave me this little smile while turning her head to the side. And I saw it. That look. The moment. The one that I will undoubtedly repeat so many times. When she drives away in her car for the first time. When she is leaving for the Prom. When she is getting on a plane to go to college. Okay hopefully there will be no plane as I will undoubtedly die if either of them go that far away. I saw those moments that my mom told me about not long ago. The day I was having a break down about not having babies anymore. When she said OH.. have you seen this? or this? or this? Well mom, I just saw what those moments will be like in the eyes of my daughter. Heaven help me. I don't know how all of you moms of older children did it. I don't want them to grow up. I treasure every day as I know all to soon they will be gone.

3 comments:

Chris said...

*hugs*

It is hard to watch them get bigger. The fact that Alex turned 9 yesterday still has my head spinning. I kept looking at him yesterday remembering the trip to the hospital the day he was born and everything that followed until he arrived in my arms.

It is a heart wrenching thing to watch them grow up. But the good news is that as hard as it is, each new moment of the next stage is even better than the last.

But trust me, a good cry about it now and then is never a bad thing :-D

Chris said...

I forgot to say that I love that song too :-) Haven't seen the video yet, but the song made me all teary.

Tracy said...

That song makes me a blubbering mess every time I hear it. I've always thought he had a great voice though.
Where do you get this Kraft magazine because Lord knows, I need help in the kitchen too! Send it my way.
Oh and come see me. You haven't been over to visit in a while.