When I grow up I want to be...

So Freida is getting sick.. or so I thought.. her little nose was running, her cough was going deep in her chest causing her to lurch forward and grab her chest with each rasp. I was planing on getting her into the dr tomarow on my day off, so brought her to the sitter. On my lunch I had to go to the store to buy some Delsym.. which is the worlds most kick ass cough syrup evah! Yes its expensive, yes the taste is gritty... but you wont cough for 12 freaking hours i kid you not! anyway so i brought it to the sitters and went back to work. I get a call at work at 3 pm and the girl tells me that my sitter is on the phone. UH OH... Gigi never calls unless something is REALLY bad. she says that since noon (its 3 pm) Freida has thrown up five times. She wont hold down a teaspoon of liquid, medacine, 1/4 piece of bread.. nothing. She is also burning up. She has no thermomoter but she knows it is high. High enough for her to have put her in the bath not once but TWICE... which has not worked. I'm freaking out... I cant leave there is no one to cover for me, she is so sick, I dont know what is wrong. I attend to my patients then the next break I got I called my momma. I said I think I need to take Freida to the ER after work, not sure she can wait till the morning, and would she come watch Fred for an hour or so while i did that. She says of course but what is going on with Freida. So I tell her it all, in the midst of which I hear my own voice cracking... And I'm usually level headed in the face of soemthing like this. She reasures me that unless it is A, B, or C that the ER wont really be able to do much, and unless she is dehydrated she will probably be more comfy.. as will I at home. Okay well she said it a little different but that is the gist of what my overworked, overtired, overworied brain could take in. So I go about my patients till my next break when I call Gigi for a check in, and relay what my momma said. She agreed much to our chagrin due to her condition. So I asked my mom if there was any way she could get a night light on the way home as I had forgotten to get one on my lunch hour and (this could be a whole nother blog) that is why I didnt get anysleep last night... cause theirs broke. Of course she says again.

So I get done, quick clean up and head to pick up the munchkins. Momma is there and snuggling with Freida. Now let me say (in a very loving way) that my mom is the biggest most bestest germaphobe that ever walked the earth. She does not come in the same room as someone who is sick let alone hold them. But yet Freida is okay because she is in Bah's arms. So I ask them if they are ready to go home to which Freida replies no... but as the next words come out of my mouth.... and Bah can walk us home.. She eagerly says yes. So we run home in the rain, get upstairs and settled in my apartment, and once again Freida wants nowhere but Bahs arms. With being able to look over about every thirty seconds and say I love you mommy. The best of both worlds.. how fabulously safe and taken care of my little bit must have felt. And Bah must have known this because she stayed to snuggle. Then Bah offered to go get her "sick pop" aka 7-up. She says okay and says goodbye (the only time i have ever seen her not try to get my mom to leave).

So we snuggle while she is gone, Freida falls asleep on my arm but wakes when I go to lay her down so the three of us snuggle some more while we watch Mickey Mouse. I see bah pull up which is the signal for me to run down. wow she went for pop whats all this? she hands me the things with these instructions... "These two bags are open because they are for the munchkins.. not all tonight but for tomorrow too. These two bags are for you to leave at the bottom of the stairs till they go to bed cause they are just for mommy. (they were tied shut). This is the sick pop in a big bottle. And these (handing over a dozen roses and babies breath) are so you know that if you are a mommy you are ALWAYS beautiful." Yea I teared up. So I gave kids sick pop, special juice, and oyster crackers for their night time snack. Put them to bed, arranged my roses piece by piece in a vase, and went to get the bags.

One held light bulbs for the kitchen lights that were all burned out but one but I had no money to replace, and the 7 year new bulbs to switch in other rooms that she must have noticed were out as well. The other bag held tapioca pudding (my favorite), ravioli, sauce, chocolate, and little wieners. A mommy dinner, with desert, and wiener. lol.. I'm crying again. Cried when I opened them up, and cried when I'm typing this.

So I've decided that when i grow up I want to be my momma. She is unlike anyone I have ever know. She has always been there for me, even when I've pushed her away. She always knows what to do, say, or give to touch me in just the right way. I aspire to be her, but doubt I will ever get to her level. I hope someday my kids will look at me and see an ounce of what my mom is. Then my life will be fulfilled.