Monday, August 27, 2007

Hungry Hungry Hippo

So today.. today I'm starting a diet. Kind of Weight watchers kinda not. I don't have the money to actually go to meetings. But that's okay... I can do it (and Mrs. Jo may do it with me). I'm also not going to eat after nine pm. After that time i feel the loneliest and eat then eat again.. oh yea.. and sometimes eat again. But you know.. you always here about "The divorce diet".. PS.. you should see Gigi.. she looks AMAZING... anyway.... my divorce diet lasted about a month.. i couldn't eat hardly at all and what i did i threw up anyway... then the reallllllll divorce "diet" came out. The one where the more lonely or depressed i got, yea you know it, the more i ate. Hence me now being at my largest weight ever. Its making things worse. How can anyone love me until i can totally completely and truly love myself? I know i cant get back to the one time in my life that i actually FELT skinny and attractive... it was during my parents divorce and i weighed all of 107 lbs.. felt amazing.. could wear anything.. and looking back looked sick and anorexic. But i want to loose 60 lbs at least. 60 is my starting goal. So today.. today is the day. No more.. tomorrow, next week, first of the month.. its today people. so now.. I'm a hungry hungry hippo!! and yes I'm allowed to call myself that since I'm dieting. So I'm starving.. but at the same time when i think about it I'm not really hungry I'm just not stuffed at every second of the day. To top that off I've had a on again off again (although mostly on again) migraine for three days. So hungry hungry hippo + migraine = not a totally happy person but you know... it will only take a few days and i will be better. I'll get through it.. and I'm determined too. I will be a much happier person for it.

What else today.. Fred is just killing me.. hes so grown up all the sudden. He came in from the balcony and said.. "Freida wants me for something don't worry mommy.. I'll tell her its night night time" I said okay and waited.. he came back in and said "Oh mommy i need your help" So as i think this is very cute go in there and am talking to Her and Fred says "I know Mommy... here..." And precedes to sing Rock A Bye Baby to her.. in full.. it was THEE most adorable thing EVER............. EVER!!

And as a last parting note.. I'm going tomorrow to sign the loan papers for the retainer for my lawyer. But you know its a good thing too since it will get me credit since i have none since everything was in Dicks name... So look for later posts on how that's going.


Lainey-Paney said...

That is soooooo cute of Fred.

A loan for a retainer on a lawyer?
Okay, that must totally suck. And, I imagine that you go into this (with the lawyer) and have no idea what the final cost will be--do you? that's soooo scary to me! credit is better than bad credit, right???

Pokey Puppy said...

Lainey-well.. not exactly.. i had a couple of things on that werent great and we did a joint bankruptcy last year... so no its more of a bad/hardly any credit situation.

Yes its scary as hell.. but he said he honestly doesnt think that it will be more than that. So you know.. just crossing my fingers.

And yea.. my freds a stud. Then again so is gage!

Mrs. Jo said...

Well good luck on the "diet". I am sure that you will do great. Me on the other hand..who knows if I can do it. I would love to do it with you. To have that support of one another..BUT that of course means that we would have to talk WAY MORE OFTEN so that we could keep each other on track!? SOOO are you willing?

OH and fred..yep he's a keeper ;)