Tuesday, June 26, 2007

The Vagina/Penis monologues

So ... (in my best teacher voice) what is the diference between a boy and a girl? you are old enough to know my fellow mommys and daddys. Boys have a penis and girls have a ... well another part they pee with thats NOT called a penis!! lol.. okay so that kind of broke the whole teacher thing.

This morning i was trying to get ready for work when Freida comes bareling down the hallway going 180 on her little bitty legs... i asked what was wrong to be told "I GOTTA GO PEE, I GOTTA GO PEE!!" So i said okay hurry! I know.. as if she wasnt already! so she goes and is barely even done when i hear slightly bigger feet coming my way. Which of course is my son coming to go too.. anyone with parents knows that that was coming! so she goes to finish her breakfast and Fred comes in.

He procedes to get distracted as every little four year old boy does and is trying to talk to me.. he has a slight stutter when he is distracted or trying to talk fast. All the while dancing back and forth holding his pee pee! I finaly get his attention half way through and ask him if he has to go potty. He then replys OH YEA!! He walks to the potty and I resume curling my hair. I then notice he is sitting. I say do you have to go poo poos honey? Nope.. just pee pee he replies.

I then asked him why he is sitting down then. (for anyone who does not know Fred and Freidas father and i are getting divorced) He replies.. in a exasperated tone... "Mommy.... I cant stand up and go potty here!" Oh i think to myself.. i aparently missed that memo! So of course i ask why.. and he replies as if it is perfectly common knowledge... " I have to sit and go pee her but at daddys i can stand" So again.. knowing whats coming i ask why. He states.. you sit and daddy stands so that is what i have to do at your houses!

Silly me.. what ever was I thinking?!?! Guess i'm gonna have to figure out how to pee standing up!


PC said...

LoL, That is so funny. You have to love the logic of little boys.
You can always get one of those P-mates(http://serendipitymine.blogspot.com/2007/06/summer-is-here.html) to help, just remember to shake when your done.

Tracy said...

Oh, so you're in the same boat as I am only yours is a little older than my little man. I wonder if there's a class out there somewhere that teaches women to pee standing up? We'll have to look into that.
PC has a great idea there. That thing might just come in handy afterall!
Thanks for the comment on my blog. I hope you come back to visit again!

Pokey Puppy said...

pc.. thanks for the tip! i might just have to get that.. but imagine a relative coming across that one!! lol.. just trying to explaine it.. oye

tracy.. Yes i will admit i did do this blog after reading yours.. lol.. I agree.. lets start a class!

Anonymous said...


The answer to your troubles dear sis

Diane said...

I remember my first born standing in front of the toilet, pinching her tummy, and proceed to peeing all over her feet in an attempt to "Go like Daddy does". It's amazing to me how soon those little sponges in their brain begin to discern the male/female differences.
Also makes me wonder, if they know enough of our position while using the toilet, why don't they pick up on lowering the seat when finishing or flushing? My advice, start now building good toilet manners!!

Slackermommy said...

Too cute! My son thinks girls pee out of their butt.

My Minivan Is Faster Than Yours said...

One of my girlfriends was just telling me yesterday she's taught her 3 yo to stand, spread and pee in the backyard. Niiiice!

Love it!